I started writing poems as an outlet to the madness in my head - some when I was well and some when I was really bad. Today I feel like sharing the ones when I was really bad, then starting to get better. These 3 poems were written at a stage where I was feeling suicidal and was clutching at anything that would stop me doing something stupid!( my family!) I just wanted to share, especially to those other unfortunates who have depression in whatever form - I know the bad, but from the fall the only way to go is back up again.
Let me know what you think:
The endless darkness.
You listen to me when I’m sad
And try to make things not so bad.
The pain just won’t go away
There’s nothing that anyone can say.
My tears fall silently in the night,
I pray that something might show the light.
I’m tired, I ache and my brain won’t stop,
It feels like I’m falling with no end to the drop.
Can anyone out there really know
How guilty I feel and how terribly low?
I feel like I’ve been ripped from inside
Of my spirit, my life, my purpose and pride.
There’s nothing left but an empty shell
In a spiralling darkness of personal hell.
I felt you in the distance
Send your support and love
To try and shield and protect me
Like a cold hand in a warm glove.
I felt you drawing nearer
When my hour of need was most
Stopping the worst from happening
Me draining from flesh to a ghost.
I felt you standing by my side
When the darkness was all around
Showing unconditional love
Those times I wish I had died.
I know that you’ll always be there
My loving, protective one
You’ll find me the light to show me the way
You’ll save me by showing just how much you care.
The light came shining from above,
An energizing gift, full of hope and of love.
The dazzling colours dancing around,
Like waves crashing over the dark, gloomy ground.
New feelings begin to flourish and grow
Happy thoughts breaking through endless sorrow.
A world of new possibilities are born,
A wealth of new feeling emerge with his dawn.
As if waking from some horrible dream,
Strength, belief and control start to gleam.
Like beacons of life beginning to grow,
Lighting the dark with a powerful glow.
Next time I'll post some of my more 'light hearted' poems!!